11 Signs That You're Having A Quarter-Life Crisis

If like me you're around 25 and you'd like to think you got until you’re about 100 years old before you bite the big one, all blue rinse, blue veins and blue WKD, but you have absolutely no idea how the next 75 years are going to play out, then there’s a good chance you may be suffering from a very real quarter life crisis.

According to the Wikigods: “The quarter-life crisis is a period of life following the major changes of adolescence, usually ranging from the late teens to the early thirties, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult.” 

In all my thoughtfulness I’ve put together a checklist to help you self-diagnose. You’re welcome!

1) Do you? Feel way too old and way too young at precisely the same time; there’s no middle ground!

In no way do you feel old enough to own property, get married or have babies but you do however actually start to have those bastard creeping thoughts telling you to ask yourself: “Is this outfit too young for me?”

NB, it’s probably not.

2) Do you: hear songs that you assume are pretty much still cool or at least semi-fresh, played ironically as “vintage” or “retro” in Topshop?  Recently I have heard Ashanti, Blu Cantrell, Aaliyah, TLC and loads more, which is awesome, but I feel as if I’m enjoying it in the wrong way, like too genuinely.

 

3) Do you: have no idea what Nicky Minaj is and why her face/voice/clothes/hair does that? Where did she even come from?! Is she actually just a knock-off Lisa Left-Eye? Go home Minaj; you’re drunk!

4) Do you: realise that there are certain things that you will NEVER grow out of? So far, mine are: anything to do with Disney, Haribo, Farley’s rusks, dancing around in my pants, my Sega Megadrive, The Spice Girls and any swing set in any park.

I don’t find it weird to appreciate these things in my mid-20’s, awesome stuff will always be awesome, no matter how old you are, and it’s quite nice that when someone tells you as an adult that you’re too old for something, you now know the right words to make sure they never do it again!

 

5) Do you: start to distrust most of the decisions you have made previously in your life, possibly even up to the ones you made this morning? It's become way too easy to say “ I was a kid back then, WTF did I know?!” Would you change your uni course, past/present boyfriends, your career path, where you live, the decision of getting a fringe cut or keeping that dress which you bought and forced yourself to wear because you lost the receipt but it made you look like sausage shaped disco ball with no breasts….it took me YEARS to throw that out!

6) Do you: stop at random intervals in the day and say: “God, that was 10 years ago!”. This is usually said about High School or Beyonce's Crazy in Love.

7) Do you: start arranging a “catch-ups” or “check-ins” with friends? You're no longer just making an appointment to get wasted? 

8) Do you: start to think you may be falling behind with social media? I got as far as Facebook and then thought I was pretty damn with it when I took up with the Tweets. But now everyone’s all: “You’re not on Pinterest, Instagram, WhatsApp, Snapchat and (I don’t know) Bebo?" No, I’m not 'on' every single new way to tell people who don't care that someone bought me a Coke with my name on it! #crackabook!

9) Do you: realise that the “older ladies” in the films you watched as a kid are actually the same age or younger than you! I just got invited to my 10 year high school reunion, I used to think Romy and Michelle were, like, 40?! I'm getting the inkling that, no, actually I don’t have all of the time in the world to piss about, 30 is no longer a magical and horrendous concept (a cautionary tale for twenty-somethings who get too cocky) it’s real and what’s more, it’s five years away!

10) Do you: romanticise about what you could have been if you had made different choices? I sometimes think, “I could have been a dahhhncer!” When really, if I'm honest, when I twirl around more than once I throw up in my mouth, the only time I go on-point is to reach the biscuit jar and some times, I fall over (I’m talking face-planting here), whilst standing completely still! 

11) Do you: get desperate in your comparisons of yourself to people you think are more successful? “It’s ok: that person I went to school with might be married, CEO of their own PR company with an offshoot fashion label and internet empire….but they're three months older than me…..so I've got time………yea, I've got time.”

 

So you're having a quarter-life crisis, what to do now? 

Stop panicking! I know you are and I get why, but just stop it.

You should be moisturising more. However much you moisturise already, just do it more.

Start trying to save up your money, any money, it'll hopefully help you get better with your finances over time; even if you start doing this in seemingly futile, pointless ways. For example, my BFF gave me a money box with Michael Jackson on it for Christmas as a joke (HILAR) but I've now decided that I'm not allowed to enter my apartment with a £1 coin in my purse, or else, Michael gets it. I may be poor but he's sure getting rich!

  
Most importantly, take stock of the progress you’re making because trust me, even if it feels as if you’re not making any, you are!

Try making a little 20’s list! Make a note of at least one thing a year that you've accomplished and that you’re proud of, even if it would seem tiny to other people but it means something to you. It’ll make you feel better and it might help you see where you're headed so you can make sure there’s something to add next year!

Here is mine:

Age 20: Met my first, real life, not made up, actual, serious boyfriend.

Age 21: Graduated University.

Age 22: Took the plunge and had corrective laser eye surgery.

Age 23: Finally got my driver’s licence.

Age 24: Started a little, registered company and invested in building my own skills.

Age 25: Moved city and hooked a relevant job which could actually turn into an enjoyable career.

I’m sure your list will look very different to mine, but your 20’s are important and we’re all so busy that they can just fly by. So take a while here and there to look over the seeds you’ve been planting and appreciate the work you’re putting in, even if no one else does!